Don’t Call Me a Slut

“In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up in costumes and beg for candy. In Girl World, Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it.”

-Cady, Mean Girls

To quote the infamous movie Mean Girls: “In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up in costumes and beg for candy. In Girl World, Halloween is the one day a year when a girl can dress up like a total slut and no other girls can say anything else about it.”

Many of you will have attended halloween parties this past week, dressing up as witches, cats, vampires and so forth. Many of you girls, will have put on your best mini dresses, low cut halter tops and well, you will have shown some skin, perhaps more than you usually do. So was Cady right when she said that girls dress up “like a total slut” during halloween? I myself attended a party this past Friday wearing a dress tighter and shorter than I would usually wear and while I was dancing the question did come up in my mind, was I being a hypocrite? Could I be a feminist if I was wearing clothing that was so revealing? Was I now “a total slut?”

What even is the meaning of slut? Today anybody can be called a slut. It has become a term to degrade usually women, to make them feel inferior, insecure. According to some I was a slut just because of what I wore, to others I was not a slut because as Merriam Webster defines it, a slut is “a promiscuous woman a woman who has many sexual partners.” Either way, it usually has a negative connotation, made to put a women down. However,  I believe that despite this, we should start changing the narrative behind the word. The term could become empowering if we decide to see it as something powerful. If it means that, as a women to be allowed to express my sexual freedom, to be confident and comfortable in my own body  means being called a slut, than you know what, I will wear that title with pride. We have the power to take back the word and make it something that doesn’t necessarily have to be negative but can become something that is powerful and that a modern day women doesn’t have to fear of being called. However, this does mean that for a starter, girls to must stop slut-shaming one another. 

Photo credits: Victoria R, Pinterest

As even Cady indicated in her statement, it aren’t the boys who necessarily slut-shame but it are the girls. “No other girls can say anything else about it.” It aren’t the boys we are afraid to be slut shamed by but the girls. If we girls and women want to be seen as equals, we have to in the first instance stop putting one another down.How can we achieve anything if we remain fractured and cruel to one another? If a 100 years ago ,when the first feminist wave occurred women of colour, class,education and sexual orientation had seen one another as equal and fought together than maybe we would have achieved more by now. If we stop making one another insecure by labelling girls as whores and slut-shaming them behind their backs then maybe that one girl who got called a slut for wearing a low cut top now wouldn’t be ashamed of her body. Or that other girl who got judged for choosing to express her sexual freedom now would think herself worthy of love and not have believed that she was a whore. Or maybe that girl who wore a short skirt wouldnt believe that it was her fault that she got raped…

What we say has more impact than we know. Terms such as slut and whore are not just damaging to the individual but society as a whole. The Unslut Project is an organisation aimed to fight against sexual bullying as the consequences can be everlasting. Little girls growing to believe that expressing their sexuality and being confident is wrong. Putting one another down becomes a never ending cycle of hatred, dividing one another when really we need to be united. I encourage you all to check out this organisation and educate yourself and one another on the detrimental results caused by sexual bullying.Their website contains stories and videos of victims harmed by labels such as slut.    

The Unslut

So to link it back to Cady’s quote, yes maybe she was right that halloween is that one time a year where a girl will dress up as a total slut because it is the only time where she can truly be confident in who she is. She in that one night is truly powerful as she expresses her freedom and is comfortable without the risk of being judged. It is the one night where girls don’t slut shame one another and look at what an impact it has. 

Do you have a story you would like to share? Comment down below your stories and opinions or use the #lapetiteboss. You can contact me through my social medias, @AltchiAltchi or via my email,

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This week on Personality

Hey Everyone! This week’s episode we will be having the BioTech Society! They will be coming to promote their event Bio -Hackathon, a scientific student start-up competition.

Then, me and Rol-J will have a controversial discussion inspired by current events. We will debate the question ‘Is there a time limit on how long a government can be held accountable for crimes of the past?’

We will talk about the two following events which both of us have respectively researched in depth:

° Turkey and the Armenian Genocide => Rol-J will be the Devil’s advocate.

° Transatlantic Slavery and Reparations => I will be the Devil’s advocate.

Looking like a million dollars (but on a budget)

 For anyone who knows me, they will say that I have an addiction when it comes to clothes. I of course have no clue what they are talking about, but I do love a good shopping spree and admiring the fashion kings and queens that walk this earth . I can’t help it, its in my blood! Both my parents adore shopping and dressing up so it really is no surprise that I turned out the way I did.

However, it comes at a price. My wallet often suffers and being a student, I live life broke. I never know where my money goes but hey, its worth it. Therefore, to further fuel my addiction, I have discovered new ways of shopping. I can’t say that I “discovered” new ways of shopping as they have always existed, but I am bringing the attention back to some of the forgotten tips and tricks that we especially as students need. 


This seems like an obvious one but sales is an easy way to save money. Most shops and online stores have all year round sales and because I am a cheapskate I usally just buy things from the sale section. I rarely pay the full price for my items because one, I’m broke, two, I’m cheap and thirdly, when buying from brands like h&m, zara, forever 21 etc., these items were made for very low costs and the prices usually are higher than they should be, so I just am not prepared to pay the full price when I know that in a couple weeks it will be half the price.

Raid your parents closet

You’d be surprised what your parents have but trust me, you should have dig in their closets because they will have things that now are back in fashion. I am fortunate that my mother has always had a pretty good sense of fashion and, while she is much taller than me, I have somehow figured ways to style her clothes to my liking. Not to forget, fashion always repeats itself. Those flared jeans that were so stylish in the 70’s have made a comeback, or what about skater skirts which are modern versions of the petticoat skirts?  Trust me, go have a look, because not only will the clothes be happy to be worn again, but out of experience, you will always get tons of compliments on your old school outfits.

Dress from my wonderful mother and belt and bag from my grandmother

Thrift stores, kilo stores and charity shops… the new heaven 

Out of experience, I can tell you that thrift stores and charity shops have become the new playground for shopaholics like me. These are the easiest ways to save money and still find the most amazing things. Of course, some energy and determination is needed to take the effort to dig into the boxes and fight the overflowing clothing rails but usually you are rewarded. And sometimes you can be really lucky. I for one have had some very lucky finds, a Burberry skirt for 16 euros, a blazer from scotch and soda for 10 euros, a party dress for 4 euros and even a prom dress for 86 euros(which actually used to be like 300 euros) and well I could continue but then I would just be bragging. More appreciation should be brought to thrift stores, kilo stores and charity stores as they will save you money and even the planet as we learn to recycle clothes more.  

Tip: Don’ be afraid to go to the opposite genders clothing section because as we know, gender is a construct and clothing tends to enforce it. i personally love looking in the mens section, especially when it comes to finding oversized t-shirts and graphic t-shirts.

Pants thrifted, top (again) from my wonderful mother

Social Media and Apps to the rescue 

There today are multiple apps in which we can easily sell and buy second hand clothing through apps and save our coins while still looking stylish AF. An example of this would be Depop. Now I’ll be honest, I haven’t used the app yet as sadly enough it is mostly based in the UK and not in The Netherlands, where I live. However, if you are in that area or happen to be in America, where like minded apps exist, your life will be so much easier, or at least the life of your wallet. It will also save your closet as I can say that currently, I am having a clothing epidemic as I just have too much stuff. So these apps also make sure that you can get rid of clothes you dont wear and make room for new clothes! Depending in your area, maybe with some research, a similar app exists where you live and for all you fellow dutch readers, if you do know of one comment down below and help a shopaholic out. 

Online shopping…

Many of us have experienced the late night shopping benders, filling up our carts with everything we wish and desire to have, only have those dreams shattered by the shocking bill at the end. Yes, I can just imagine all you readers just nodding your head and dreaming of all the things we wished we had. Its a sad truth BUT luckily after this article you’ll know all the tips and tricks and with this last one, I will also save you from the ridiculous bills at the end of late night shopping benders.  Of late, the craziest rage has been online stores such as Fashion Nova, Pretty Little Things, Misguided and so on. They are all popular stores that often have cute things which have somewhat of a decent price. Now for some, this still is too expensive, so let me introduce you to Shein. Shein too is a similar store but is even cheaper! Yes you read right, CHEAPER! Of course I’ll be honest, the quality isn’t always amazing (can’t be for the price you pay) so I advice reading the comments always to see what people have said but if you don’t mind clothes that only last for one season, then this is for you.  I have bought stuff there in the past and have 90% of the time been happy with what I got. Some failed items did make it to my garbage bin but that is little compared to the items that till this day, I still enjoy wearing. Read the comments, and stay away from jeans but otherwise go wild and you’ll be amazed with the cute and cheap stuff you’ll find. 

P.S. Also check sizing ALWAYS    

Well these are some of my tips and tricks that I use frequently and well they have never failed me and even better, saved me hundreds as a shopaholic! Comment down below or use the hashtag #lapetiteboss with your tips and tricks.  

Feminism-Let’s talk about it

Feminism-what is it? Now, I know what most of you are all thinking. I know what a feminist is, they are tomboys, with short hair who hate men. Or maybe you are thinking, it’s those extremists that parade shirtless in the streets, marching for their right to “free the nipple.” Or maybe you believe that they are a group of individuals, purely fighting for their rights, their right to vote, to have equal access to education, to not be discriminated based on their sex in the workplace and to be able to walk the streets at night without being harrased. 

There are so many different definitions of what people believe is feminism. Back in the 1900’s we had WKKK (Women of the Ku Klux Klan) who yes, were racists and anti-catholics, however did fight for white protestant women’s right to be seen as equal to their white, protestant male counterparts. Would they be considered feminists? Or what about the concept of White Feminism? They fight for women’s equal right while at the same time oprressing non-white women, but are they still feminists? Or what about the organization one million moms, who fight to have their voices heard and to end the exploitation of children by the media, yet boycotted Toy Story 3 due to a scene that hinted support for the LGBTQ+ community. Feminists or homophobes? I could go on because there are so many different definitions but arguably so, they are feminists. I say this with care because they are not the feminist definitions that I agree with but it cannot be denied that down to the core, they are fighting for their right as women and to not be discriminated based on gender. 

Photo credits to: 5 Misconceptions about Feminism– Her

 Now let’s take a road down memory lane. Back in my senior year of high school, I was persuaded into becoming the co-president of the feminist society. Even though I already considered myself a feminist, I had never seen myself as someone who could lead a society. Being a relative timid person, this was a huge step, but looking back it was a great experience and I learned a lot from it. There was one thing in particular that I will never forget. During the fair in which I was doing my best to recruit members to join the society, I noticed that about 90% of the people who came to visit our booth, were female. The other 10% were boys, the majority who laughed and walked away. I couldn’t understand why. Were the boys against equality? Then this one 9th grade boy came up to me and asked the question I will never forget. “Do you guys like hate on men?” …I think I could have exploded. So, let’s make one thing clear once and for all. No, feminists DO NOT hate men. We want to be seen equal to men. We want to be treated equally and to be seen as humans. Not as objects or pieces of meat who can be harassed, subordinated and ignored. We want to be treated with respect and dignity. That is what feminism is all about. It’s not about hating on men and overpowering them but it’s this fight to prove that we are worthy and that it is our human right to be treated as humans.  

People’s definitions of what feminism entails will differ because we all have different goals of what we want. Me for example, I want to show that I can be a feminist without having to make riots, without having to hide my body and that my definition of feminism is defined by however I want to define it. I consider myself, a lisptick feminist. I only recently came across this term through a friend who called me that and it perfectly describes me. I am a fashion victim and a makeup addict who happens to be a feminist. I was shocked when my own father once said “ how can you be a feminist if you like makeup and clothes?”( sorry dad, throwing you under the bus here but I know that in your heart your a feminist too). So yes, I am girly and happen to conform to my genders stereotype in many ways, but that doesn’t change the fact that I am a feminist and that I fight for the rights for girls to have equal oppertunities so that they can grow up feeling like they can be whoever they want to be and can achieve their dreams. My definition of feminism doesn’t just end with gender though.I also believe that as a feminist I don’t just believe in equality when it comes to gender, but also in equality when it comes to race, religion, sexual orientation and so forth. As a lipstick feminist, I believe in equality for all human beings. 

“As a lipstick feminist, I believe in equality for all human beings.”

I am not afraid to call myself a feminist because I believe that I shouldn’t be judged about who I am, purely based on the gender that was assigned to me. So what is your definition of feminism? Comment down below or use the hashtag #lapetiteboss with your definition of feminism.